fanfic: Callie/Arizona - Two Years
Summary: It has been two years, and Callie remembers...
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The song I refer to is by Vonda Shepard "I only wanna be with you". Here's a link: www.youtube.com/watch
start reading here:
It has been almost two years now. Two years she thought to herself. Wow, time had passed by so fast. Sometimes she still couldn’t believe it. Sometimes it even seemed like a miracle to her that she was so entirely happy, with a woman. A woman whose smile still could make her heart skip a beat. Even after two years she still catches herself staring at the woman she has gotten so used to being around, who she has gotten so addicted to. The thought of not being with her sometimes hits her out of nowhere and makes her feel physically sick and numb. Even if the woman she loves more than anything in the world is sitting right next to her she can imagine and feel the emptiness, the hole that losing her would create in her soul. Although loving someone so much sometimes still scares her she knows it is all worth it. The past two years had been amazing
Her thoughts go back to the day Arizona Robbins had introduced herself in the bathroom at Joe’s. Hey! Ortho, right?! I’m Arizona Robbins, peds surgery. I’ve seen you at the hospital. Are you ok? She smiles at this thought and remembers how confused she had been, and to be entirely honest, also a bit annoyed that this blond woman wouldn’t leave her alone and kept talking and talking and talking. Something about good talk. She remembers exactly what she was thinking at that point. Sometimes communication is overrated. Then the blonde peds surgeon had said something about people lining up for her. A smile of disbelief crosses her face when she recalls how stupid she had been not to see what was going on right in front of her. Then again she had been incredibly busy with being miserable and alone. All of a sudden the other woman had kissed her. A woman she didn’t know had kissed her, pretty much out of nowhere, in a bathroom for heaven’s sake. When she moved back from the kiss she saw it for the first time. That smile, those dimples, those blue eyes, that beautiful face. Thinking about it now she knows she had been addicted to seeing that face ever since, although it hadn’t always been easy. After that first kiss things did get a bit rocky she has to admit. But eventually they had gotten over the newborn incident. After that it all just felt so right and easy.
She has to admit to herself that although technically Arizona hadn’t been her first woman she had been the first person she really loved. And Arizona had been the first person who had really loved her, unconditionally. Her memories go back to the day she knew she was in love with this perky blonde peds surgeon with butterflies on her scrub cape. The thought of it still gives her goose bumps. It was about four months into their relationship. That night they had been out for dinner to an Indian restaurant, both of them had the next day off so they decided to open a bottle of wine at Callie’s place. They had put on some music and just talked, cuddled up in each others arms when one of her favourite songs came up. She remembers listening to the lyrics:
I don't know what it is that makes me love you so, I only know I never want to let you go
'Cause you started something, can't you see, That ever since we met you've had a hold on me
It happens to be true I only want to be with you
It doesn't matter where you go or what you do I wanna spend each moment of the day with you
Look what has happened with just one kiss I never knew that I could be in love like this
It's crazy but it's true I only want to be with you
You stopped and smiled at me, asked me if I'd care to dance I fell into your open arms and I didn't stand a chance
Now listen honey, I just wanna be beside you everywhere As long as we're together honey I don't care
'Cause you started something, can't you see That ever since we've met you've had a hold on me
No matter what you do I only want to be with you
She recalls all the things that had happened after that first kiss. They had even danced together in her apartment, which was probably one of the best dates she had ever been on. But the moment she had listened to those lyrics she knew how completely in love she was with this woman. It just hit her in this very moment. She winced.
‘Are you alright?’ was the question the woman in her arms asked her.
‘Uhm, yeah, I am…I just…I don’t know.’ is all she could manage to get out. She recollects excusing herself to the bathroom, leaving a slightly confused and irritated Arizona behind. But she just needed a few minutes to gather herself. She stood in front of her mirror looking at herself, listening to the debate going on inside her head about whether she was ready or not to say these three word out loud just yet. She had felt those feelings building up for quite a while but now they had surfaced with such an intensity she wasn’t sure she could keep them to herself any longer. A faint knock on the door combined with a worried ‘Calliope is everything OK?’ had reminded her that she had been in there for quite some time. She had taken a deep breath opened the door and without a word took the blonde woman’s hand and pulled her back to the couch they had been sitting on just before. She sat down, pulling the other woman with her. She searched for that song again and hit play. She said ‘Ari, can you please listen to the words very carefully? It’s kind of important.’
While they had been sitting there, silently listening to the song she couldn’t believe a chaos of feelings inside her. Her head was spinning and she felt like she had lost track of time. Not to mention those damn butterflies that seemed to be racing around in her stomach. Before she knew it the song had finished and the other woman had turned towards her just looking at her, not saying a word, just looking at her with those deep blue eyes. She wasn’t able to read her face let alone guess what the blonde woman was thinking. Gosh, she wanted to say those three words so badly. She wanted to let her know how she felt. Her heart was telling her what to do. But for some reason her heart and her head weren’t working together very well. Her head wouldn’t allow her vocal cords, tongue or mouth the order to speak them out loud. She got up walking around the couch, stopping in front of her, looking at her, trying to speak, trying to mouth the words that in this very second meant the world to her. Her mind was so busy with trying to get her head and her heart to work together that she didn’t realize that the woman, who until now, hadn’t really moved, got up. She came over to her. And there it was again, that smile, those eyes, those dimples, this ridiculously beautiful face. She came over and simply kissed her. And that did it, that simple kiss broke down the wall her head had built between itself and her heart to prevent it from being broken again. But right there, right then she had seen it in the other woman’s eyes. She didn’t have to be scared anymore. She saw no heartbreak in those baby blue eyes. The only thing she had seen was love, deep, true and unconditional love. Love with no boundaries. Love that could last forever.
‘I love you’, she said and smiled.